Breakfast: Chex Cereal and Activia (every time I read Activia, I sing it like they do in the commercials...silly I know)
Snack: Trash Mix---Fresh Popped Popcorn, Crasins, Rasins, Hand full of Chex, very bottom of old Trail Mix from Wal-Mart, very bottom of old can of mixed nuts. Hey, don't judge...workin with what I have on hand...
Lunch: Tuna Plate---Romaine Tuna wraps, Celery Tuna Boats, Tomato Tuna Bowls, Cucumber Slices and Rice Crackers...gave her LOTS of options...it was a bad day (read further)
Dinner: Crockpot Chicken, Brown Rice, Steamed Veggies
Today was one of those days. I am sure that we will have several of them. We are going to have to get use to them. Life is different now. We have to accept that and do the best we can. I know these things. And, Yes, while I am removed from the stressful situation I can tell myself these little tidbits of wisdom. However, while surrounded by 16 bouncing Girl Scouts all screaming to buy and eat cookies...it is a bit hard to stay focused.
I do not know any Mother who enjoys having to tell her children NO. I, unfortunately, have had to say that word more times than I would ever like to for financial reasons. No, we can't go see that movie right now. No, we don't need to buy that toy right now. No, getting ice cream isn't in the budget this week. No, No, No, No, No, No, No, NOOOOOOO.....
Now, I am also saying...No, you can't eat this, No, you can't eat that....
I lost it today. I just couldn't take it. I know she is 9. I know she is just a kid and wants to eat her dang Tuna on a piece of bread, so she can make her fold over. I know eating GF is just as new to her as it is to me. But, can't she see that I am trying my best? Can't she see that I too want a piece of bread to eat my tuna fold over on?
It all started this morning at our Cookie Booth sale. All the girls were munching on yummy Cheetos, Lunchables, pretty much EVERY type of food Avery can't have. They were all being so very sweet and sharing all of their snacks that they brought. Each one would say "Hey, Avery, do you want some?" and in return Avery would ask me, which turned into a chorus of "No, you can't have that, but you can have your trail mix." Well, stale peanuts and popcorn is NO WHERE near as good as chemically coated cheese curds.
Theeeen they opened a box of cookies and all the girls were eating cookies. Now, here is where I myself was also salivating. I want a freaking cookie too ya know!! They are girl scout cookies after all. But I was strong and steadfast with my "NO".
Then, we get in the car to go home and I start talking about making lunch. I list off what is available, not a whole heck of a lot. Avery returns with nos to all of it. I say I am not running a buffet and she is gonna have to work with what I have. We settle on tuna.
I am just about done mixing it all up, I have every vegetable I can thank of that will work as a base for tuna and the Rice crackers that I found at our local grocery store. She walks into the kitchen and says "wheres my bread?"
I lost it...Do you blame me?
Tags: frustration, journal